What The Market Hath Wrought
The real tragedy today isn’t that the Federal Reserve is suddenly cool with inflation, that hedge funds are being forced to churn out “Sorry about that” letters on an hourly basis, or that there’s a 39 percent chance that Countrywide Financial will be forced to hold a fire sale. It’s not even that John Devaney will soon be helicopter-less. You want to know what the real crisis that’s unfolding before our very eyes is? What’s the cause of this pandemic of fear? What you should be losing sleep over? What billionaire Eli Broad *is* losing sleep over? It’s this:
Due to the major losses hitting hedge fund managers and other insanely rich people with their money invested in hedge funds, many hideous and grossly overpriced pieces of what individuals who lack the cognitive ability to parse “art” from “crap” call “art,” will go unsold. Or, if not unsold, sold at a vastly undervalued price. According to Mr. Broad, who seized the opportunity being offered by Goldman to give its failing Global Equity Opportunities Fund a bunch of money, ``Many of the buyers of contemporary art have been hedge-fund managers and other investors who obviously are having a difficult time and have lost lots of money…The art market will soften, and an adjustment in values will take place.”
Take the infamous diamond-encrusted skull, “For the Love of God,” by Damien Hirst. So far, nobody has agreed to its asking price of $100 million. Last month, nearly 40% of the pieces in an Old Masters auction failed to sell. And we imagine that if Stevie Cohen hadn’t already purchased Hirst’s dead shark in a tank of formaldehyde, it would remain unsold, too, though that would’ve been on account of an Intervention of Taste, and not the subprime mortgage market collapse. (And also, because let’s be honest, though no one can say for sure, Secret Steven probably hasn’t been hit too hard, if at all).
Goldman Backer Broad Says Hedge-Fund Woes Infect Art [Bloomberg]
Comments
I really want that skull.
Posted by: de Cosmos | August 17, 2007 03:15 PM
correct, it's pretty disgusting to even talk about this kind of stuff when people are losing their houses, but it is the world and environment we live in.
Also, SAC is having another fine year my sources have told me... Stevie can purchase all those art pieces he really wants at big discounts
Posted by: jtb | August 17, 2007 03:21 PM
Only an idiot would give money to the hedge fund manager who is going to buy that skull for $100MM...
Posted by: Anonymous | August 17, 2007 03:34 PM
How much would it cost to get a skull and crazyglue diamonds to it yourself?
Posted by: Zbignew | August 17, 2007 03:47 PM
When Forbes starts doing a trillionaire list, that skull will show a compunded IRR in the double digits to the original buyer for sure.
Posted by: Anonymous | August 17, 2007 03:51 PM
"it's pretty disgusting to even talk about this kind of stuff when people are losing their houses, but it is the world and environment we live in."
Uh ... what?
Posted by: Anonymous | August 17, 2007 03:52 PM
jtb,
Don't be a communist.
Posted by: eric | August 17, 2007 04:09 PM
"it's pretty disgusting to even talk about this kind of stuff when people are losing their houses, but it is the world and environment we live in."
So, what bmw should I buy? 760 or the new M6 coupe?
Posted by: zanzibar | August 17, 2007 04:12 PM
M6. And you should get a vanity plate that says "CAPTLST"
Posted by: Anonymous | August 17, 2007 04:18 PM
Check out the "Naked Shorts" blog, there is a link to the sales brochure for Devaney's helicopter, talk about "Pimp My Chopper"....
Posted by: NoChopperForLife | August 17, 2007 04:18 PM
oh I don't mind if people are living excessively, especially when times are good...this industry has helped me earn my living...and I don't mind that HF managers make so much money, it's what the market will bear. Just kind of sad, as the article alludes to, that people are referencing the potential decline in the art market when their are larger concerns in the economy right now (ofcourse, to each his own)
Posted by: jtb | August 17, 2007 04:19 PM
One person losing their home is a tragedy. One million people losing their homes is a statistic.
Posted by: Fake Josef Stalin | August 17, 2007 04:53 PM
Definitely the M6 (good daily driver), but I suggest you pony up for something serious, I was thinking along the lines of the Bugatti Veyron, because 1000+ horsepower in NYC is really an absolute necessity.
Oh, and the license plate should read FUMONEY...the same thing you should name your yacht ("FUCK YOU MONEY" would look great in 4' gold letters, no?)
Posted by: JT | August 17, 2007 05:10 PM
The M6 is nice as a winter beater (and 500HP is a necessity too!) that you can curb if need be.
Then again, buying a 760 and then sending it to Alpina for some mods is perfectly acceptable if you like the old-man-style of ride. Avoid spinners for wheels and no ground effects!
Posted by: Calgary Schmooze | August 17, 2007 05:40 PM
Say want you want about Stevie C., but that skull is awesome. Buying it definiltely provides you with a writ of douche-baggery, but making it was highly cool.
Posted by: Anonymous | August 18, 2007 12:05 AM
is that tank made for two ?
Posted by: boy | August 18, 2007 02:48 PM